Monday, February 9, 2009

Umm Reese's? We Have a Problem...

The first year Adam and I were together I spent spring break with him out here in California. We went to the grocery store to get some reinforcements, and his eyes lit up like a kid seeing Santa for the first time when he saw the Reese's peanut butter eggs. They are his all-time favorites. He brought home two packages, and the first time I tasted one I knew my world would never be the same. I thought finally an Easter candy I could like. Because lets face it Peeps are undeniably evil, and eating Cadbury eggs is like drinking syrup straight for the bottle. Eww. (I'm sure I’m going to get some comments of disagreements about that statement, but YOU CAN’T CHANGE MY MIND).

I ate every single one of the eggs in one day while Adam was working, much to his dismay. But Adam didn't complain, because he understood how absolutely privileged he was to have me as a girlfriend (hardy, har, har). The next two Easters found me stuffing packages of peanut butter eggs in my desk drawer at the dorm, and lying to my friends about having any left when they asked me to share. I will share my clothes, I will share my soda, but please don’t ask me to share my reeses.

But once Easter passes the candy disappears, and I can save some money & quit torturing my thighs. Then I learned last December that they do the same thing at Christmas with peanut butter trees. I was so excited. I could now get my fix two times a year! Adam and I both bought a lot of those trees over Christmas, carefully labeling each with a "B" or "A". And hell fire & brimstone would rain down from the skies, if one of us so much as looked at the other's candy. Christmas ended, and I was happy to give up the candy till Easter; because I typically don't have any form of a sweet tooth.


So when I saw that they were now doing Valentine's Day hearts, I was understandably excited. I mean I had barely even finished detoxing from Christmas! But when I opened the package, I didn't find that the item looked much like a heart. In fact, I decided it kind of looks like an ass (Do you see it?). As strong as my addiction is I just can't bring myself to eat ass-shaped candy.


22 comments:

  1. I might object to that too. Good call.

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  2. LMAO, i never really thought about what it looked like til you mentioned it. I love the Reeses eggs as well but my main addiction as far as Easter candy are the Cadbury mini Eggs that have a crispy coating on the outside like an eggshell then the inside is chocolate. I don't share them period.

    Anyway, I have a whole box of the Reeses hearts on my desk......i'll never be able to see them as anything but ass candy now though. That's just messed up lol.

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  3. Put them in the freezer, and they are extra yummy!

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  4. I have to say...I'd probably close my eyes, be very careful, and chop it in pieces with a knife. And then eat it. Because then it wouldn't look like a butt anymore. ;-)

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  5. oh my that is too funny. I guess, you could make them into milkshakes. I love peanut butter chocolate milkshakes. Oh well your thighs will thank Reese's for their lame attempt at a heart.

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  6. Turn it upside down. I think they look like chocolate testicles. Just food for thought.

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  7. @Nessa-I'm glad I could ruin that experience for you.

    @PaulsHealthBlog-Oh I know I love that, especially with a big cup of milk.

    @Angi-I might just be able to power through butt candy.

    @Kreations-Yum, I'll have to try that. I also love to make peppermint milkshakes.

    @Erin Tales-laughing my ass off! They do!

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  8. OMG...Ass-shaped candy!! You are too funny!! ha ha ha...no, I don't think I could eat it either!! ha ha ha ha

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  9. Oh, funny! I like how you find these things for every holiday! What do they make for President's Day? Obama peanut butter heads?!

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  10. Ohhh I'm with Neesa, I'm all about the mini egg. YUM. Last year, for Lent, Coast Sister and I gave up chocolate, and at Easter we went NUTS. I'm not even Catholic, so I still don't know why I did it, I guess to prove I could. It was torture. And I guess I don't have as much discipline as you, but I think I could eat butt shaped chocolate, just cause it's chocolate. ;-)

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  11. Oh but it looks so good! I think I will need to pick some up!

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  12. Oh gosh you are a funny girl! I have never tried these but hell they look good. No I would eat the ass candy - it if tastes good I don't care what it looks like. Email me some will you!

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  13. I love Reeses and I love Reeses Eggs - Christmas trees not so much, and I think you're right about the ass-shaped candy -- but none of them can beat the original cup, as far as I'm concerned. The shape really really makes a difference. You know how much I love Reeses? You ever seen that Reeses "Stop Global Warming (or all the Reeses will melt) ad? It's hanging on my living room wall. It really is. Love your blog - I'll be back!

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  14. Those Reese's treats are my fav too! And I completely agree with you on the Cadbury Egg bit. Yuck!

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  15. Ya gotta love those Reese's Eggs/Hearts/Trees... "drooling' :)

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  16. I think compounding the problem that it looks like a butt is that it's also....brown. I am doing Weight Watchers right now, trying to slim down, so THANK YOU for effectively giving me reason not to scarf these things down, because alas, I too am a Reeses addict....

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  17. Is it safe to eat those (since they have peanut butter in them)?! I do see the ass like qualities!

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  18. When my kids were growing up (and even now with one more still at home), I always buy "extra" at Easter -- I mean, the Easter bunny has to have her own stash, y'know???

    Brittany - I enjoy reading and learning more about you so much that there is an award waiting for you at my blog!! Hint - it involves cake! Come and get it!!! Peace, Sue

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  19. OMG why did you post these? They are so good. I don't know why I think they are way better than the Reese cups but they so totally are. Wonder if hubby will pick some up on his way home from work?

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  20. I'm so lucky they don't sell those here yet! I know I would want them too. Tho I love Cadbury's Creme Eggs above all things.

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  21. I know it's August -- but, just read this now. I agree with Erin: they look like chocolate BALLS!!! I would so eat/nibble on them. Yum.

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