Calisthenics

Since I wrote a entry a few months ago about my traitorous golden retriever, Sarah, who seemingly preferred my fiancé to me, our relationship has grown exponentially (ohhhh big word). I'm not saying that now she loves me more than Adam, but she totally loves me more than Adam. She has even started following me around almost everywhere I go. However sweet this may be, it can be semi-troublesome when I'm trying to mop the floor and she won't budge, or I'm folding the laundry and she makes a bed on top of my warm, clean clothes.

I didn't really notice she was following me around until my mother and grandmother were here a few weeks ago. When I would leave the house and they would stay behind, she would still wait with her nose pressed to the front door until I came home. But the real proof came one night after they had gone to bed, and I had pulled down the Murphy bed which when down blocks off the kitchen entrance. The house is circular and you can get to every room from any room in the house. I went to the bathroom and Sarah wanted to sit outside the bathroom door and wait for me as she often does. She freaked out about not being able to go through the kitchen, so instead she busted noisily through the bedroom door. Successfully waking up everyone in the entire house.

Sarah has several habits that I've come to adore. One of the things she loves to do is to roll over on her back & use the hardwood floor as one giant back scratcher. While doing this she moves her legs as if she is riding a bicycle, and grunts as I imagine an elephant would if it were being pulled through a hole in the fence. This looks like a ton of work, and I wonder if she is really just trying to shed some of those unwanted pounds from her hips and thighs.


Sarah's Backscratching Technique (Patent Pending)

Step One: Use your weight as momentum to hoist yourself onto your back.

Step Two: Take a moment to catch your breathe, because that was hard work.

Step Three: Thrash your legs around like you are on a paddle boat, allowing your owner to take compromising photos of you, that would seriously hurt your campaign if you ever decided to run for president.

Step Four: Collapse immediately from exhaustion, safe with the knowledge that you can do it all over again in just a few hours.
This was all very funny and cute to me, until I found her scratching her back tonight at the dog park, in a BIG PILE OF MUD.