Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Passion Smashion

When Adam and I moved into the cottage we decided that our basic cable days were behind us. We were tired of having only a few channels, especially since half of them were in Spanish. So I've been watching a lot of TV lately, catching up on shows I had fallen behind on. I’ve mostly been watching the channel Bravo, since they have been playing non-stop marathons lately. Today I was watching Top Chief, and it occurred to me how very passionate these people are about cooking. And it is like that on most reality shows. Like them or not, you have to admit these people really know what they want. They know what they love, and are trying to make it to top anyway they can. And I can truly admire that.

So as my butt was forming to the couch in a potato like fashion, it occurred to me that I don’t have a passion. And this thought made me sad. I do have a few hobbies. I like photography, but I'm an amateur, and I don't want to make it a career. And other than blogging, watching bad TV, and playing The Sims 2, I don't have many other interests that I take seriously. Most of my friends know what they want in life. They want to be teachers, nurses, and screenwriters. And I hate it when people ask me what I want to do with my life, because I honestly don't know. And they give me that look, which says, “She went to college, and she still doesn’t know?” And I know that look well, because it is the same one I give myself in the mirror sometimes.

How do you find your passion? Do you wake up one day and just know what it is you want to do? Do you get out into the work field and then find that you either love or hate your job, and then it just clicks? I have never had any lofty career ambitions, except when I wanted to be a zoo keeper and a garbage man as a child. I like psychology but I don't want to be counselor. I love history but have no interest in being a teacher. And sometimes I wonder how am I supposed to find the perfect job, if I don't really have an idea of what I want in life?

After I graduated from high school, I went to college because that was just the thing to do. It was expected of me, and I do not regret going to college. I see education as important, and it gave me four years to put off making any important life choices. But now I'm here in the real world, and I would be lying to say I'm not terrified. What if I never find anything I am truly passionate about?

I often wonder if it is my anxiety that is really what is holding me back. I'm so afraid of failing or looking foolish, that a lot of times I don't even try. I'm terrified to really want something, because if I don't achieve it what will everyone think of me? I don’t want to disappoint anyone. And what if in pursuit of an goal, I realize that I'm actually just inadequate. This is really my biggest fear of all.

So I pose this question to you, my friends, what are you passionate about and how did you figure that out?
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3 comments:

  1. Wow, that's pretty bad if you say you have no passion, I think your just not seeing it though. Your trying to mend passion into a career, and while that would be nice, it doesn't always happen that way.

    My passions are taking care of my children, photography, and writing. It's not something that is a passion from the start it's something that became ones after learning to love it. For me passion mends with love. Not necessarily the type that is intimate between two people, but more a full love of something. If I love something, then I'm turning it into a passion by working at it, and making it the best it could be in my eyes.

    You have a passion, you just look for it, you'll find it. :)

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  2. I just realized I have a passion for travel :)

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  3. I didn't realize it for a long time, but my passion is baking. I was sure, for YEARS, that I was going to be an interior designer and then a journalist for Rolling Stone Magazine. Finally, I discovered that there is too much math involved in designing (I really just wanted to decorate) and I don't enjoy writing for other people.

    When I was younger, I hated baking. Mainly because my mother always made me do the baking, and the only baking that happened in our home was the baking of a two-layer, chocolate cake, with chocolate icing. There was no creativity. But I found (after moving out of my mom's home) that I LOVE baking.

    I've been very lucky thus far, I'm now baking for a living without having gone to school for it.

    Maybe...be a travel agent? Or maybe a meeting/event planner for a nation-wide business? I don't know what you went to college for, but maybe you could write for a travel blog/magazine.

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I love comments, and I always read my comments. But sometimes I make a mental note to go comment back on your blog, and then forget to (Even if I’m an avid read of your blog, whoops). Since I'm so bad about this, I will mostly reply to comments in my comment section, so please check back! If you have something pressing to talk to me about you can e-mail me at brittanyervin86@yahoo.com.
Britt

 

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