Friday, May 23, 2008
Oh The Places You'll Go!
I ended up not attending the job interview that I had scheduled for yesterday. This may seem a little rash when I so DESPERATLY need a job. But….I don’t know the area around here, and I didn’t realize how far away it was. It would be an hour commute to and from without any traffic, and that’s a lot of time and a lot of gas.
I also found out it was more of a sales job. It’s not that I’m not interested in this, because right now I’m interested in almost anything as long as it doesn’t involve me having to hide from the police. Although it may not show on here, I do have social & general anxiety disorder. My mom has a lot of anxiety, as does my grandmother. In addition, my mom had a very high stress pregnancy when she was carrying me. I've read lots of studies that show a correlation between high stress pregnancies and the development of anxiety in children. So I guess I got it honest.
But because of this, having to try and sell things every day would leave me in a constant state of anxiety (worse than I am now). I don’t want to live that way. And if I didn’t sell anything, I might just take it personally.
I just hope I made the right choice. I’ll probably wonder about that choice until I get a job. Which I hope is really soon because….(I interrupt this daily broadcast to announce) the COTTAGE is now officially ours!
We can move in June 1st, but we don’t know if we will right away. Because we are going to slowly start moving our stuff over there. Plus we still have 30 days in the place we are living now.
So my game plan is this-if I don’t have a job midway through June, I’m just going to take anything and continue looking for more gainful employment.
I’m just trying to keep positive and not worry about getting a job, but that is really hard for me. And I freak out about every other day. But that’s just crazy, sweet, nervous me.